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Archive for the category “Quickbits”

05 Aug 2013
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The Last Word

I am going to take you back to the school yard here, the argument that leads to the fight, the calling out. Depending on your selection of words this is where the true blows are thrown.

Sometimes we get into discussions and they turn into debates. Last one standing wins, right?  Well not in Musical Chairs. The need to be the loudest or having the last word is reminiscent of our childhood. The person we were to become crying out, ” I am here notice me, I have something to say.” In adult world it is just down right annoying.  For as bad as being “shushed” or silenced it is equally irritating to have someone constantly placing an addendum to what you have to say. “You do it first, No you do it first, no you…” in an endless cycle until one tires and their silence concedes a victory to the other, is what comes to mind.

Fast Forward today; there is someone in your life that lives, embodies, exemplifies having the last word. To them it doesn’t matter if what they are saying is truthful or relevant, all it has to be is enough to validate they spoke last. They aren’t particularly agreeable and they also need to be right, whether or not what they are saying is CORRECT does not matter. Yet when you encounter them, know you have a very simple way of disarming them. It does require a bit of ego cleansing on your part though. All you have to do is say,” You are right___”. That does not say you agree, it simply says you aren’t going to argue and/or debate with someone who clearly has the answer(s) already, all the answers. This may take a time or two for this individual to catch on but the reward will be great, and you also spare yourself the fate of becoming exactly like the one you are trying to teach the lesson,” It isn’t the point you have the last word, it is that you say something significant whenever you speak.”

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22 Jul 2013
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Stepping Out

Once there was a little girl who had lost her way. A kind handsome stranger saw her wandering around appearing to be lost. This gentle man went to her and made things better. He not only showed her the way she needed to go, he went along to protect her. Only after awhile it didn’t seem like they were getting to the destination, she could see it in the distance but every day as they seemingly moved closer the destination still appeared to be in the far off distance. She began to question in her mind if the kind stranger really knew the way. The paths they took started looking like roads they had gone down before. Time went on but they still did not get to where she was going. He took her to a beautiful house but once inside over time it became a cave. She could always see it was light outside, but feared what might be waiting because she had been there so long. One day she went to the door while he was sleeping, she opened it and stood there.

Are you standing on the brink of something? Do you need to take that all important move, but for one reason or another something holds you back. I think the most difficult thing to do is recognize what is missing or what needs correction/ adjustment in regards to self. Pointing that “finger of blame” is far too easy for a lot of us. A crutch does not simply support you, after a while you become dependent on it.

Many are broken and need healing, but once the healing process has taken place you have to be brave enough to test those areas, stand alone, and yes “get to steppin”.

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12 Jul 2013
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VIBE

What is it you are sending out? Is the mood you are in reflective of your condition?

Sending out negative only allows it to bounce back. Frankly, negative is something most of us could do without or deal with a lesser amount of. It also comes to us so easily, so effortlessly that we may not even be aware that it is happening. You have to realize unlike charm and personality, your VIBE cannot be turned off and on at will. It is deep within you, a part of your being, like your individual pheromone. Now you know why some stranger will talk to you, or maybe decide not to based on something you have no idea about. Yet it is happening anyway. It is in the air, atmospheric if you will.

It is autumn, it is warm in the day and cool at night. Later in the season it will be cool in the day and somewhat cold in the night, but that’s okay. This beautiful time of year gives off a VIBE that makes you want to breathe in sunshine and sway with the leaves to a tune of the crisp breezes. After you take in some of the wonders of the day go out and spread some of that beauty to someone who is in need; you don’t need to say anything they will feel it, they will feel you, they will get your VIBE.

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12 Jul 2013
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Tired

Ever wake up and feel like rolling over and covering your head? Sure you have. What makes us tired? Well there are the textbook answers, working hard, being under stress, not getting enough rest. Yet, the one thing that doesn’t come to mind and should be first on that list is from not doing anything. When we humans don’t use what we have, we lose it. Muscles atrophy and so do our brains.

I had this thought as my mother crossed my mind. She is 79 never learned how to drive but you’d be hard pressed to find her at home during the waking hours of the day, unless she just wasn’t feeling well. While we do not necessarily need to be in a constant state of motion, we do not need to overdo the rest state either. You are tired because you don’t do anything, and you don’t do anything because your are tired. Now injury and illness will slow you down, but that is not the audience this is directed at.

The state of Georgia tops the nation in childhood obesity, and our children are now developing adult-like diseases. Remember when kids went outside to PLAY? It is hot outside but I have to let you in on a secret, “IT’S SUMMER”! There was recess in elementary school and physical education in middle and high school. The release of energy after being made to sit, listen, and learn had/has benefits that we are now seeing are vital. Plus the habit of inactivity is a pattern that can and will follow you throughout your life.

Now in the morning when the alarm goes off don’t cover your head or throw something at the clock. Take a moment and do some deep breathing, fill your lungs up and release that oxygen, it will get the blood flowing and your heart pumping. Roll out of bed onto the floor and do a little yoga and stretching. Make your way into the bathroom get refreshed and ready to face another day, and be grateful that you are here to face that day.

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16 Jun 2013

Father Figure

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY.

If you are never special to any other man in this life, on this Earth you have your father. The tallest, smartest, most gallant, and did I mention handsome man you will ever lay eyes on; that is until you meet the other true love of your life and of whom your father will generally threaten with an inch of his life if he dares to hurt you.

To his son he is given the “heir apparent” treatment, as though he is the future king of a country, no matter what his Earthly material possessions be. He gives lessons on bravery, honor, trust and DIY projects. His shoes seem so massive that you know you will never be that large; then one day you wake up and you are fitting into those shoes, as though they were custom made to fit you.

No joke, on the heels of the premier of the movie “Man Of Steel” perhaps you have a real life “Superman” in your presence and you know him personally. He lives up to his legend and like the legend he has only one weakness.  No matter how much time passes, no matter how invincible he may seem, he cowers in vulnerability as this weakness will always appears to him in the form of the small helpless being that “he” in fact simply marvels at, his child. Let him know that it is alright to be vulnerable for that is part of love; love he has taught you and love you feel for him on this day, and every day since the day you laid eyes on one another.

Again I say, “HAPPY FATHER’S DAY  to all the fathers everywhere; for no matter what space they occupy otherwise, there is always one reserved in our hearts.

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11 Jun 2013

Chili Dogs, Lemonade, and Waffle Cones

Yes summertime is here! The temperatures indicate it and my cravings confirm it. Before 10 A.M. I am thinking about my favorites. Now mind you I haven’t had a chili dog in about a year, because as much as I love hot dogs I know the nutritional value is null and void, plus you have to factor in the addiction quality and the ever expanding waistline. The waffle cone and lemonade, well that’s a whole different story.

Food memories taking you back to a place you may miss more than you know. Today I feel like frozen yogurt for breakfast, not because we ate frozen yogurt or ice cream for breakfast, but it takes me to a place where someone who would think of such a menu would not be deemed as shocking or irresponsible or even silly. Plus with the frozen yogurt I can excuse and substitute to a point, where my analysis/explanation actually makes sense.

Remember when three months out of the year all you had to do was go outside, play, and not destroy anything; at least anything that could be traced back to you. Along came adulthood and responsibility to mess everything up.  We have to eat right, obey rules, and go to work for the pleasure of being tied to this rule infested place.

We are “little kids” trapped in a land that offers certain freedoms on one hand, but those same freedoms are hidden by walls of responsibility. Summertime weighs heavy on our minds. Two weeks or even a weekend is a sought after commodity, but it is clouded by the rapidly approaching end, that is clearly in sight. Yet for whatever time we have we wear outfits a bit too tight and too young, run( or a reasonable facsimile there of) around the water in “speedos”, and drink stuff that gives us way more than a “sugar high”. Well so…  We are charter members of the IDGAK Club. After all what good does it do you to live a long life, if you don’t stop and have a chili dog along the way.

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11 Jun 2013

All Us In Wander Land

There is tremendous stock placed in having a plan. Plan for  your future, plan for your business, plan for life. To succeed you must have a systematic map set in place. However, it doesn’t always go like that. We do not control all the other elements that may or may not affect our plans. What happens then when something gets in your way and alters the course of action/plan you derived? Better yet what happens when you don’t even have a plan.

Wandering aimlessly through life, you just may bump into something that will carry you  through to a meaningful existence. I do not by any means suggest this method, this is merely an observation. I can think of a time  or times when I really had no idea what to do next. What did I do? I improvised. Our society seems ill-equipped to handle surprises or to seek an alternate solution, because we are so busy looking for the easy way out. The fastest, simplest, least challenging way to obtain anything, that’s what we want. Oh but now it needs to be quality. Yes I am over simplifying this however, there are some truths hidden in this wit.

What to do when faced with a dilemma that you have no way to conquer. You do not have the knowledge you, do not have the resources. What you have is the awareness that you cannot see your way clear. You also may be painfully aware that you are tired of the battle. Children wish their problems away, adults face their problems; they have no choice, but oh how they wish for the child’s solution/escape clause. Draw upon that which you KNOW you have and see what you come up with, then maybe you will have some good solid advice to share with someone else wondering about, searching for a solution or purpose. Trust me on this, the answer is there you just have to discover it. Therefore, I’ll let you know how I make out.

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19 May 2013

Enough Said

When you have been hurt or disappointed in life by an individual, often time all you see or can concentrate on is you. As an after thought and in an effort to NOT wallow in self pity try this.  Take on the role of the one you are upset with and use the “pro-con”method to see what you end up with. Then think about where you go from here.

You are angry with me, but you won’t say a word. I am choosing to accept what I see. I say you seem upset you say you are not, there may be a bit of sarcasm but I am taking you at your word. I don’t know you any more, truth is I probably never did. Are you being honest with me now, have you ever been, moreover have I been honest with myself. Now I want answers. Pride  will not allow me to assume full responsibility for even the things I know I have done. I want to move on and move forward, that does not mean anything beyond what I just said, nothing is implied there are no undertones. This is face value time and if you accept this then it means you must be accepting it with no conditions; like you have in the past and in the way I have always been able to convince myself that you have been okay with. End dialogue.

No one knows you better than you know yourself and as scary or lonely as it may seem, it is better to be true to yourself than to end up with a load of regret(s). Battle with selfishness here; consider the others who may be involved and could be affected as well. Where you go from here is ultimately your choice, the ball is in your court. However, the truth is, it has always been.

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10 May 2013
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Can’t I Just Be A Hero

Without you ridiculing me for not being able to articulate on your level. Because I am not a polished media personality, can’t you understand and appreciate the good thing I did. I am a simpler person, not in my mentality but in the complexity of my life. Yet through it all, I still managed to do something good and worth recognizing. What are you doing besides talking about what I actually did.

The next time some individual is put out there on the news who is not dressed particularly well, who does not speak with the poise and intellect that you may possess, don’t laugh or shake your head in disgust and disapproval. Look at the bigger picture and recognize the “good thing” they have done. That is what is worth noting and appreciating.

“Hat’s Off to you, Charles Ramsey”. I know at least three people who are very happy about your very presence alone. Remember folks these people that are interviewed off the street have not had the luxury of a script, three hours of make-up, and a wardrobe coordinator. They have an extraordinary experience happen to them, and it is quickly followed up with a camera and microphone SHOVED in their faces. Yes this is oversimplified, but doesn’t the media over expose the negative aspects subtly, while trying to feign a  sincere as-a-matter-of-fact tone?

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07 May 2013

Speak To Me

If you cannot listen to and learn from your companion, then why do you have them. Frustration is like an active volcano. It is ready to erupt at any time. Sputtering and spurting from time to time serves only as a forewarning. This “baby” is gonna blow.

There is no way to convey how very important communication between you and your loved one is. There actually is no need; for if you are in a good relationship you are practicing this and if you are in a not so good one you realize that you are not communicating and this is a major problem.

Writers generally like to communicate and feel very comfortable doing this on most levels or at least one for certain. When you are emotionally involved with another person there are a number of ways that communication takes place, but these ways which are expressed in forms other than talking sometimes take translation. No matter how well you know another person, it does not hurt to say “Talk to me, tell me what it is you are feeling”. Then they are given the chance to express themselves on no uncertain terms.

Women talk to much, men talk to little, neither listens to the other because each has preconceived notions about the other’s comprehension and we have trouble understanding why communicating is difficult?

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