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Motivated by a lack of material.

Archive for the tag “honesty”

05 Oct 2011

Disconnected

Going through the motions of life. When you do things so often it becomes automatic, “I could do this with my eyes closed”, it is not hard to see how one might become disconnected. Without supervision or intervention, the most reliable machinery might run into problems. Thus a disconnect becomes inevitable. Right in the middle of the process something goes wrong and then there is silence.

The clutter and dust build up daily on what was once your pride and joy. You are preoccupied with other things right now, but you will eventually get back to it. RIGHT… Remember when you spent hours making sure everything was perfectly situated? Now look at what once was important to you. Unattended to, unsupervised, and neglected it is out of control and falling apart.

Have you found yourself feeling this way about people who are or once were close to you? It is an odd feeling. The “Love” that was physically and mentally beautiful; your very first love experience, the one who single-handedly holds your youthful sensuality, and now the only significance is you once knew this person. What about your” best friend”; you were always together and still you had time to talk on the phone , when was the last time you spoke or visited.  “Oh they understand because we are so close” is the excuse you give yourself.  Are you really being honest with yourself here?  After all, we are talking about being disconnected aren’t we?

Why do you always have to be the one who calls? If your friendship meant anything your friend would make the call every once in awhile. A month has gone by and perhaps you spoke once. This is rapidly becoming a norm for you all. Yet, it is okay.

We complain that there aren’t enough hours in the day to do things, but we crowd our lives with devices and methods that allow us to do more things at what we deem the same time. The results are we are just as tired, the projects we have are done in a rushed inferior manner, and the people we just never get around to talking with them. For the sake of efficiency, we call it multi-tasking.

When I began this piece little did I know that our pastor would be speaking about this similar subject, but he took it in another direction. He said we are so wrapped up in texting and multi-tasking that we forget what is important, and we need to DISCONNECT; while my approach was do you wonder why you feel DISCONNECTED. In either case the main focal point is that we need to slow down, stop, and re-evaluated the way we are doing things and handling people in our lives.

No matter how rapidly you do things you still have that same 24 hours in each day. No matter how slowly you move yourself, time will continue to go forward. Therefore, what is important is that you make the most out of whatever you do whenever you do it. That means bother to give each endeavor the needed, required and desired attention for optimal results.

Finally, realize you are only going to get out what you put into anything. Cramming things together, trying to do it all at one time, and making empty gestures( I’ll call you later). The less time, effort, and/or heart you delegate will NOT magically yield positive results simply because you want it to be so. Hang up the cell, get off the internet, log off the computer; disconnect from technology for a while so you won’t feel disconnected with life.

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28 Sep 2011

You Owe Me The Truth

We need a service, we do the research, we hire someone, they do the job, and we pay for that service. Simple process; at least it is easy enough to understand. There is a need, an expectation for fulfillment, and the final stage is payment. I want to talk about that final stage, the settling up, if you will.

I have often observed how easily and rapidly we will have something bad or negative to say and we will go out of our way to complain; but when someone does something good, positive, or admirable suddenly we do not have the time. This fosters a behavior in us to look to someone else for all of our problems and thus we feel correct in blaming others for virtually everything that we see is wrong.

Let’s examine this service issue. Since my business provides a service I feel like I am qualified to address this and I am going to draw on personal experience. I can say that most of my customers are happy. We have established a rapport with them that allows for a friendly exchange. We do try to make it clear that we are professional and take what we do seriously. Therefore, if there is a problem we want and expect to be given an opportunity to address and correct that same problem if it is at all possible.

Recently we have encountered a new type of customer, and I am going to call them “the quickies”. “The quickies” are being named that for some very pertinent reasons, they are quick to complain and quick to quit. This behavior leaves any reputable business wondering what really happened.

Example one: this “quickie” had been approached when we started our business a few years ago. We offered her a competitive rate, we knew her home because we provided her with this same service when we worked for someone else. Two years passed, she had quit our former employer due to financial issues (she said), but now she contacted us wanting to obtain a quote and possibly start service. We came to an agreement and went out to do the job.

Upon our arrival there was a note asking us to do something additional. Now when you are in a service oriented job additional service can be provided, but often it is with an additional cost. The smart thing to do is to inquire prior to the actual service being scheduled. This did not occur, but being professionals we did what was requested and made her aware this was not a part of  the regular service of which she ordered and that there is a charge for the additional services.

Afterward we requested feedback; and all we got was positive comments along with an apology for asking for the additional work. Again, the exchange was friendly and positive. Therefore, I was accommodating and let this new customer know that it was an honest, understandable mistake. “No harm, no foul”.  She happily stated she was looking forward to our next visit. FOUR DAYS LATER, she sent an e-mail to me stating that after she examined the house further she found several deficiencies and decided that she would not need our services, as she could do this good herself. She went on to tell me that she felt she did need a deep cleaning job on her house once a month, in spite of my recommendation.

“Quickie number two” stayed with our service for five months following an intense screening process. They asked for references to e-mail and/or call them to answer a series of detailed questions. It had been their experience that companies start off good, but gradually deteriorate over time until they reach a point of unsatisfactory service. Well we passed their screening and began providing them with service. We gave “Quickie number two” the same information that we provide all of our clients with, making them aware that they are not contractually bound and if there were complaints we would address and correct them promptly. ” Quickie number two” was given the same request for feedback. There were a couple of initial items deemed questions rather than complaints. These items were resolved and never spoken of again.

“Quickie number two” sent me an e-mail stating, “he wasn’t sure if he had our phone number (cards are left after each visit that have business contact information that includes the e-mail address as well as the phone number) but he wanted to inform us that he and the wife were cancelling service, because it was not up to par and they wished us much success.

Okay, now let me explain a couple of things here. I am not by any means saying our business is perfect, I do believe we do a very good job and strive for excellence. I feel confident in the service that we provide and am willing to stand behind it. If a customer is dissatisfied we have a policy to try to fix the issue; but if we can not we feel it is better to let an unhappy customer go than to try to keep one, for they will more than likely never be happy.

The former customers referred to here as “quicky number one and two” were dishonest and while from a revenue standpoint you do not like to lose paying customers, from a peace-of-mind standpoint you are truly better off. In each case I did personally answer the respective e-mails and I wished them each well. Their responses confirmed that the real problem was not necessarily our service; but their inability to own up to the truth, they could not afford to pay for our service.

This is all  really immaterial in the sense of the “why”, but again it breaks down a system that encourages honesty and credibility. If the job truly was bad you should be willing to let the provider correct the problem. However, if you say the job was not done good maybe you will drop your price, or even provide service for free to keep me.

Next time you have someone come out to provide you with any type of service, realize that along with the monetary payment that bill will not be settled to an upstanding business, until  you give that individual an honest opinion about the work they did for you. Your opinion matters; it is a gauge, a barometer to help businesses know when they do good work and where they need to improve. That does not give you authorization to lie for your own personal gain. It will hurt the next person. Remember your indebtedness can only be paid with the truth.

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14 May 2011
2 Comments

VI-haftasaysomethin

Today I had to do something I did not want to do but I had to. Through the years we all have had this type of experience(doing something you didn’t want to), and more than likely this has happened more than once.

My boy, as I liked to think of him, was born January 1, 1999. He came as  a surprise to me 3 years later, because I  never thought I would own another cat after my loss 12 years earlier. There he was sitting the cage at Petsmart waiting to be adopted. He had beautiful blue eyes and a gray fluffy coat. He was by breed a “Ragdoll”.  I re-named him , but as all things that concerned him, he never warmed up to his name or me for that matter. I can only imagine what his early life was. I know it wasn’t good, but I know we tried to give him a good home and we tried to do this for 9 years.

Today I let him go. I am sad for the loss of life, but I am not sad for him. I think he is worth mentioning because,  I believe there are situations where we put all of our energy in to and get no return. I was very convinced and comfortable with my decision. As a pet lover, I have had to make the unselfish  choice to let go before and it hurt. This was so different and I learned  about being more responsible when it comes to a life. I think I should have left Storm alone. I tried to fill a void with another individual and it did not work. I can tell myself that I gave him something better than he had, but if he didn’t want it was it really better?

Anyone other than a pet lover may find this odd. I hope the pet lovers understand and take a bit of heed, because we are generally good-hearted folks. This is just a demonstration of how we can lose track of what is really important. I now believe I would have better served Storm by giving a cash contribution to his foster parent and moving on.  I changed his environment, I changed his name, but I didn’t change him.  I did this convinced this would make him happy and subsequently me happy.

Not all of our projects or endeavors will be a success, and today I have to live with that reality.  I did not give all of this thought the day I adopted him and I wish I would have. Today I have to live with a farewell and on that note I haftasaysomthin; his name was Toby before he knew me. Peace be with you Toby.

Posted in Hafwaythroughpoints and tagged , , , , , ,
19 Apr 2011

Do You Think I’m Sexy?

Rod Stewart asked that question decades ago. It was funny and a conversation piece; for at the time we were all young, beautiful, and sexy in our own individual ways. Now as the gap closes in on us our minds still visit these places and see these things, but the vantage point has clearly changed.

I remember seeing the “May/December” romances playing out on the silver screen and shaking my head in disbelief. I thought “oh my goodness what would she  really want with him”. “Him” being Mr.December and at the time Hollywood was still making everyone in major roles great to look at regardless of age, station in life, current condition.  Now a new animal is on the prowl and she is called “cougar”. She is also as open to the verbal and mental scrutiny of young and old alike. For after all what do the young, exciting, viable want with the moderately slowing down and aged? Here’s another twist, what do we want and expect of each other.

Our children would clearly be repulsed, for even if we do not have the mature and matronly figures, the idea of a parent being anything but a parent is just absurd. We can be successful, attractive, and wise; those are acceptable. Our children are very smart; educated, sophisticated, and worldly; yet this aspect of us completely escapes them. That idea is not unreasonable, I think this aspect even escapes us . No one prepared us for growing older and being in a physical and psychological limbo.

Some of us are in denial. We venture into the cliche’ mid-life crisis arena and we should expect to be slaughtered. We act, dress, and attempt to think like we are still the same individuals that fit into a size three; when we could easily use another numeral in front of that three. Our male counterparts pretend not to feel every bone crack as they try to dunk the basketball like it was done in college, while simultaneously holding the protruding abdominal area in with such force one’s head might explode before giving in and breathing. While these are laughable extremes on some level, I think we all have to own up to a little of it.

Yes, this is very touchy and very subjective. As previously noted some folks in our group are holding-up/going to hold-up better than others among us, why not if you are so compelled at the very least stay within your rankings. Realizing we are a group that hates guidelines, rules, etc., but at some point we do have to abide by them. We have been very successful at what one may say is getting around these standards, or we can call it exactly what it is CHEATING. Accessible plastic surgery has made a lot of us experts.

However, here is a thought; as we see ourselves change why don’t we embrace the change, and let our tastes change right along with our being. As more scalp begins to show, cut it close to enhance the fact there is a nice face to concentrate on without the distraction of all that hair.  Don’t look at the increased size as the inability to wear a bikini, but as an opportunity to allow the cover-up to give you a bit of mystery. My salt and pepper gray now give me the hi-lights I never could manage to wear in my youth. Remember, it is a question. DO YOU THINK I’M SEXY? Perspective and perception work in our favor here.

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