The resounding echo of silence invades my head now. After a marathon of words I am screeching to a silent stop. I need a bit of a break, the writing takes something out of me, because I feel what I am saying. I must interpret these as pregnant pauses in order to recover, regroup, and refresh.
Here you are alone. More of your life is behind you than ahead, at least as far as new experiences are concerned. What road do you take? Do you make due and stay single or do you venture out? This one required me to actually do some research. I was/am unqualified and unequipped to address this subject on certain levels, in spite of my having quite strong opinions. My results will not be filled with stats and graphs, but information obtained from real and personal contacts.
The research began and it began with individuals very close to me. I want to see these folks happy, I believe they all deserve happiness and not the opinion of what others think happiness is.
The ladies tended to be successful in their business or chosen career. Therefore, they possess the economic spoils of doing well, nice homes, furnishings, cars, etc. “Can you say intimidating boys and girls?” To that I ask why? At this particular time in our lives haven’t we learned about the temporary state of “things”? They express the same high standard involving expectations in relationships. Although they are dealing with something that is a bit more difficult to gauge.
The gentlemen in the same status had a devil-may-care attitude.They were open when it came to relationships, until one day they really examined the age factor. Then suddenly they needed the spouse, children, and in spite of the newness they(the family) needed to catch up and be age appropriate with them. They had generally decided that the domestic aspect of life was not for them; and then with the wave of a hand changed their minds, but it took a few decades.
I submit that these individuals have spent a great deal of time without the challenges of relationships on a very specific level and no matter how appealing this may appear, they would/will be in for a rude awakening. What I am presenting is not mind-boggling or earthshaking. They are all very desirable, charming, and intelligent. They all simply want what they want, and that attitude alone is not cohesive with the type of relationship that they are seeking. Settling has been something they have managed to avoid, but in this venture if some compromising is not done failure is eminent. I smile as I think of trying to match them up with one another, but the idea of this gives me images of two cats fighting in a bag. My suggestion would be to slow it down and I am sure that will be received with contempt. Ironic, is the word I apply to it all.
What is missing and can it be filled with something else? Have we become so one dimensional that we can only operate if we have all the same “things” that everyone else we know has. I think it is important to note that none of us is truly alone with no one that cares.
Having a warm body next to you, can sometimes translates into desperation and settling. However, standing by your convictions sets you up for load of disappointments and a scant selection of what would be considered suitable. As our age advances, our considerations become less distinctive. Voids need to be filled, society tells us this is so and we buy into this thought-pattern.
I am a hopeless romantic. Although, life experiences have encouraged me to abandon the Disney/Fairytale ideals, I am still a seven year old at heart. If I am completely honest, I wish I could reach inside my soul and pluck that romanticism out of me. However,the romanticism is one of those things that you’d have to characterize as; when it feels good it is so good, but when it is bad it is HELL! Hey call me a sadist, I’m gonna hang onto it.