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It’s 2 A.M…Why Are you Awake

I may need to try some type of sleep aid. However, I have existed with the natural way for so long. I realize it scares me to think of having to use some alternative method to induce sleep.

Hard work, exercise, sheer exhaustion have always worked.  Why not now? My brain is in an overtime status. It has to figure out how to NOT overthink every little thing and block out thinking all together simultaneously. YIKES

I found out I have severe sleep apnea several months ago. I have my machine, and I use it. I immediately noticed a difference in my behavior and ability to think. I am now seeing it level off. I am finding I am shying away from things that become too normal, constant, or familiar. I do not dream or do not remember them. I now have a deep internal fear of dreaming. I did not realize getting a good nights sleep might give me a feeling I am running away from. I am running away, I am avoiding, I am STILL trying to maintain some level of control. It is NOT going well.

Let’s see now, the television is off but the lights are on. Like anyone else in need of treatment that does not get it the human brain allows the human controller to make substitutions. The alcoholic that stops drinking with sheer will -power suddenly becomes verbally abusive to his loved ones and others…substituting one bad habit/addiction for another.

Sleep is needed, it is restorative, and for health’s sake alone one MUST get at the very least the minimum 4 hours in. Watch your behavior, if you are not sharp mentally, falling asleep in traffic or on the toilet, energy level low. maybe you need to turn off the electronics, dim the lights put on soft music and your apnea machine mask of choice and get those ZZZZ’s in